It’s so frustrating how money controls everything that we do. I just want to be living in London right now. I’m willing to work my ass off to be able to live there and to be successful moreso than all the other photographers that live there… there’s so many opportunities there and I’ve got so many big projects lined up already that are just dependent on when I can get there. I’m considering a trip there for a week in July but anything I spend on that just delays when I can move there permanently so I really don’t know what to do.
I hate being stuck here on the Isle of Man. I know most people hate where they live and feel there’s somewhere better they can go, but really there’s nothing for me here any more, it’s dry. There’s no denying it’s a beautiful place and it’s been good for my photography. I’m so grateful for that but at this point I’ve used up all the interesting locations, some more times than once. Being an island there’s a limited population and I’ve shot with almost everyone I find inspiring. Now it’s just a dead end. It just has me in a bad mentality without even trying these days. I’m really not a negative person by any means but it’s hard sometimes now I’ve had a taster of what could be, and I’m left feeling like I’m being held back from all the amazing things that could be happening.
Ready to just take the plunge, move to London, spend my life doing the one thing I feel I’m even remotely competent at (or at least give it my hardest efforts and fail trying) and I hate more than anything the fact that because of money, I’m stuck for the next 4 months in a place I’d do anything to leave.